being a learning tree
“Unfortunately we learned in school that learning is locked up in books and reading is the only way to get to it. It’s not. It’s free. We’re surrounded by it. We just need to relearn how to recognize it in its wild state.” –Joyce Kurtak Fetteroll
trees are the metaphor of our life as a family. i grew up on one, climbing, hugging, picking fruit on them, my partner was all about them, getting lost on a tree when ever he could. and our children, well, they just came as trees. asking us in their own subtle spiritual way to address them as such. and since, since our coming to be as a family, trees have dictated the way we live our lives in this earth. earlier on, and i mean when Ceiba was a womb being still, we talked about homeschooling. both of us were clear that schooling was a disservice to spiritual evolution, to the holistic development of a human being. there was so much at stake when we thought of the journey ahead of us. and our focus, our values, they all lead to a unified tribe that empowered each individual to their full potential (spirit, mind, body, soul). school didn’t fit into that focus.
learning tree was born when Ceiba turned 4. after a six month period where we gave school a try, all my doubts and fears about what i was keeping my child from faded. i was convinced that homeschooling was the way to go. so she stopped going. after meditating on it for a while, i really felt that creating an environment where the child can find her/his true self, be in full love of that self, and learn from that place, he/she would radiate that love to all that is external, and then from that place build relationships, be of service. so we gave it a go, we built learning tree inside our home. the living room was transformed into an oasis of imagination, recycled useful/inspiring toys from the free store began to fill baskets. the book shelf was turned into an art shelf filled with recycled art supplies, the walls got covered in art, nature was brought into our home from our nature walks, we held a circus day, learning tree with friends, piñata workshop, we lived learning at every moment. each relationship we had with each other and with friends we kept honest, loving, fun. (note that we have moved our living room learning tree in Cortes Island to the corner of our bedroom in Newark).
let me interject here and say that learning for us as parents, has never been about “success” as society would describe. we are not trying to “mold” high IQ kids, we are not trying to “mold” anything at all. we see ourselves as the earth around the tree, we hold access to minerals, water, mycelium, but the roots of the tree, the tree itself does the magic. the tree knows what it needs at what moment, and it knows exactly how to get it, and use it, and as it uses it, it creates, as it creates it is of service to its external environment. do you think the tree thinks “i need to be successful! i must turn all these minerals and sunlight into oxygen and make sure i live long and make the most beautiful leaves, and flowers, and be the best tree ever, and get all kinds of awards for it.” truly, i don’t know what a tree thinks (at least not yet, i’m working on it) but in my heart observation of tree life, i’ve noticed and perceived that trees are in total serenity with what they are here to do, and just do it, because they trust their inner intelligence and use it to its full potential, every second of their lives. and that is what i have seen our children do every second of their lives. and i have also seen how society can be quick to suffocate the perfect and beautiful inner genius in us all. starting from the way we learn to see ourselves.
learning tree is the inner genius blooming. and in our every day life since we made the commitment to follow our conviction, we have worked towards creating an environment that allows for that to inner genius to blossom, in each of us. it ain’t easy let me tell you. there was much to undo, specially for me. coming from being an educator, working with youth, and always thinking about what curriculum to come up with next, i really had to learn to let go of controlling process and outcome. that is when i began my research on unschooling, self design, self-directed learning, etc. i was hungry for tools that would help be undo some of my control on the education of our children and embrace with trust who they are, and what they are here to do. doubt always creeps in to my busy chattering mind, but…it is always kept in check by one of the childrens’ inner genius moments.
what does our learning tree environment look like? on a daily basis i have to say that its rooted on the freedom to play. i play, kids play, partner plays. we play. one of the bonuses of being a learning tree with children is that you get to be a child all over again! art is a part of the entire day, creativity comes up at any time, there is always drawing, cooking, making a creative mess, building homes, taking trips, turning the couch into a ferry, and the bed into a train. sewing books for the little brother. building the most amazing cement mixer out of boxes and papel mache. making a dump truck with a cement mixer on top birthday cake. writing, recording and mixing your own songs. quilting a four seasons quilt (a project that has taken a year and counting). i can go on. the learning is guided by what play dictates. play is what children need to do, it is at the very core of our creative being. it is the essence of creation. and it is through this joyous acceptance of one’s inner genius that the blossoming takes place. there are some days that because of running around doing errands, or having a big emotional day, or visiting friends, the energy can get low around here. however, it is precisely with those moments that we get to know our deepest selves and our encoded rhythms.
Through being learning trees we are also learning to be a family. We are discovering the rhythm our family needs to live in so that each individual and the collective can thrive. We eat food that is cooked with care and love, we incorporate our individual needs into everything we do (ok, we try!), we speak to each other with the utmost respect (most of the time, work in progress), we give each individual an equal voice, and the freedom of choice (always there to guide when needed), we take our space alone when we need to, and we are learning together what works and what doesn’t.
About a month ago, doubt came to me again, it was after Ceiba said to me one night “i want to learn how to read.” i thought to myself, ok, there is only one way i know how to do this. i thought of all my experiences as a kid learning to read, and those where i taught others to read; and was convinced that “I” had to do this for her, i had to teach her how to read. I had met families that had experienced their children teaching themselves to read, but my “educated” mind was at a loss, doubtful that it would even be possible. I reached out to communities of unschoolers/homeschoolers that have been of incredible support in my journey (African American Unschoolers and Native American H0meschoolers) and received awesome feedback that supported what my heart believed, to trust that each individual can figure it out. in the end i accepted: Ceiba can teach herself to read.
i end this post sharing that Ceiba is reading and writing thanks to her very own desire, effort and trust of her inner genius. what did i do? i got out of the way, and only did anything that she asked me to do. “mama, spell butterfly,” “mama, tell me an alphabet story,” “sound it out Ceiba, try” i would add sometimes “no! mom, just spell it!” it was her inner self directed knowing that lead her to ask for what she needed. i am inspired by her inner genius, and it pushes me to get closer to mine. we are all learning trees in this tribe, learning each day to live our purpose! and loving it.
some goodies:
features the article with the quote up top: http://www.homeedmag.com/HEM/171/jf_art_unsch.html
Radical Unschoolers: http://familyrun.ning.com/
Sandra Dodd: http://sandradodd.com/unschooling
Loving this blog right now: http://radiofreeschool.blogspot.com/
a nice one about guiding an artist: http://www.goshen.edu/art/ed/art-ed-links.html